I don't have much to report or share this week. Seems to have been a pretty normal week for the most part, although work seemed to be exceptionally stressful. They say ignorance is bliss, but for someone else it's most likely a headache, and stupidity? Well, let's just say there's no excuse for it. I won't beleaguer anyone with the details, but if you ever want to, I'll provide full information. Some of the stories are quite funny really.
My plans this weekend are to work for a few hours Saturday (surprise, surprise), then come home, clean my house, catch up on some reading and try and relax some. Sunday I'm picking up my sister from Johnson and driving down to my parents and we're all going to go to the orchard and pick apples, maybe have some hot apple cider to really get into the swing of fall. Hopefully the weather outside will permit and the air will have the right chilly crisp to give the full effect.
Sunday night I'll be heading back home, finishing up any homework left to do, heading to bed, and starting the grind all over again. I don't even want to think about it though. Right now, I am just so looking forward to the weekend.
So today, when you are feeling that twinge of stress, just stop, close your eyes, take a deep breath, hold it in for a second and think not about all the things you don't have in life, but about the amazing things you do have: your friends, family, health and the beautiful world around you; smile and let it out. Remember that when you feel like it can't get any worse, think of that glass half full, not half empty and say to yourself, "it's only going to get better from here!"
Benny
Friday, September 24, 2010
Friday, September 17, 2010
Piling on more...
So this week I thought I would write about a new venture I have taken on. Beginning last Saturday, my sister Marissa and I have finally followed through with the promise we made to each other, that when she came up to Ball State, got moved into her dorm and settled into her classes, that we were going to start going to the gym and working out. Last Saturday was our first workout together. We go to the new Rec Center here on campus. Why wouldn't we, both of us already pay a fee on our tuition and cost, there is no additional fee to use it, meaning there is no monthly member fee, and it has state-of-the-art equipment.
I used to work out on a regular basis a few years ago. It started with a biggest loser contest at work, then I just continued on, working out, dieting, shedding the pounds and increasing the muscle. At my best, I had lost around sixty-five pounds. Then a change in my routine came; I transferred to another location within my same employer, and I could no longer go to my old gym. I said I was going to start at another right away, then I put it off for a few days, then a week, then a month, and so on. Before I knew it, it's three years later and I am just now seeing the inside of a gym again. I think the reason I put it off was because of security and comfort issues, but that's another whole issue that we won't delve into today.
So here I am, at my heaviest ever and by no means proud of it. There isn't any excuse, there is only a solution and that is to get back to my disciplined routine and hopefully start shedding the pounds. After all, at twenty-six, I'm not getting any younger and this isn't going to get any easier. So, at three workouts in for the week, I'm feeling good, stiff and sore, but good. Yesterday, Marissa and I even got up before dawn, went to the Rec Center at 6:00 AM and did our workout before class. It was hard to roll out of bed at 5:30 in the morning, especially since I arrived home from work at 12:00 midnight and went to bed at 2:00 AM after finishing my homework.
That being said, it also got my blood pumping, the endorphins flowing, and very quickly I was bright and alert and ready to go for the day. I had forgotten how much I used to love working out before work (or in this case, school) because of how good it made me feel. Working out always puts me in the best of moods, and I feel it's the result of both physical and emotional reasons. Physically, your exercise causes your body to release certain hormones like adrenaline and increases the levels of chemicals in the brain like seratonin, which I feel is what greatly contributes to my fantastic mood afterward.
Today is an off day, both because of the intense workout from yesterday and because academically I just had too many other obligations for classes. Tomorrow I'm off work and classes, so you can be assured I'll be in the gym. For now I end this here, and I hope that perhaps others might be inclined to take a step toward a healthier lifestyle with me. Support can be beautiful! Once I actually start to see some results, I may post some before and after pictures to show the progress. Remember, the only person in control of your life is you. I leave you with a quote that I feel indirectly applies to this situation. Ghandi once said, "Be the change you want to see in the world." Most would think that means that applies to intersocial situations and it does, but I think the root of the meaning applies too, which I think generally states that if you want any kind of change, in anything for that matter, get up off your butt and do it.
Change comes from within you.
Benny
I used to work out on a regular basis a few years ago. It started with a biggest loser contest at work, then I just continued on, working out, dieting, shedding the pounds and increasing the muscle. At my best, I had lost around sixty-five pounds. Then a change in my routine came; I transferred to another location within my same employer, and I could no longer go to my old gym. I said I was going to start at another right away, then I put it off for a few days, then a week, then a month, and so on. Before I knew it, it's three years later and I am just now seeing the inside of a gym again. I think the reason I put it off was because of security and comfort issues, but that's another whole issue that we won't delve into today.
So here I am, at my heaviest ever and by no means proud of it. There isn't any excuse, there is only a solution and that is to get back to my disciplined routine and hopefully start shedding the pounds. After all, at twenty-six, I'm not getting any younger and this isn't going to get any easier. So, at three workouts in for the week, I'm feeling good, stiff and sore, but good. Yesterday, Marissa and I even got up before dawn, went to the Rec Center at 6:00 AM and did our workout before class. It was hard to roll out of bed at 5:30 in the morning, especially since I arrived home from work at 12:00 midnight and went to bed at 2:00 AM after finishing my homework.
That being said, it also got my blood pumping, the endorphins flowing, and very quickly I was bright and alert and ready to go for the day. I had forgotten how much I used to love working out before work (or in this case, school) because of how good it made me feel. Working out always puts me in the best of moods, and I feel it's the result of both physical and emotional reasons. Physically, your exercise causes your body to release certain hormones like adrenaline and increases the levels of chemicals in the brain like seratonin, which I feel is what greatly contributes to my fantastic mood afterward.
Today is an off day, both because of the intense workout from yesterday and because academically I just had too many other obligations for classes. Tomorrow I'm off work and classes, so you can be assured I'll be in the gym. For now I end this here, and I hope that perhaps others might be inclined to take a step toward a healthier lifestyle with me. Support can be beautiful! Once I actually start to see some results, I may post some before and after pictures to show the progress. Remember, the only person in control of your life is you. I leave you with a quote that I feel indirectly applies to this situation. Ghandi once said, "Be the change you want to see in the world." Most would think that means that applies to intersocial situations and it does, but I think the root of the meaning applies too, which I think generally states that if you want any kind of change, in anything for that matter, get up off your butt and do it.
Change comes from within you.
Benny
Thursday, September 9, 2010
Follow up...
For this week's blog I decided to write a little follow up to my post last week. As I said before, I have been having a rough time adjusting to what I would consider a complete revolution in my life. I have a new home, a new job (relatively) and a entirely new schedule. I'm averaging fifty hours a week working at ACS, carrying twelve credit hours at Ball State. My day goes as follows: wake up around 7:00-7:30 AM, shower, get dressed, eat breakfast, grab my bag and head out the door for class. After class, I return directly home, around 12:00 or 12:30, depending on the day. I leave for work between 12:45 and 12:55 (any later and I'll arrive late), clock on at or before 1:30 and work until 11:00 PM (or later, if I'm on a call, I have to follow it through all the way to the end). Then I make the 30 minute drive back home, arrive back between 11:30 and 12:00, then I begin my homework. I'm usually up until 2:00-3:00 in the morning, then I go to bed for a few hours and start it all over again. To top it off, I had to get sick this week with some random cold.
And the oddest part of it all... it was a little easier this week. Please don't mistake this for complaining, I'm not. I'm just merely trying to paint a picture of my average day. Single mothers work full time jobs, maintain households, raise children and go to school all the time, I have no room for complaint. I have a good, steady job with open overtime at time and a half available, which in this economy, is largely unheard of. I may not like the work all the time, but I'm paid well and it's easy work. I'm fully supporting myself, paying my rent, my bills, putting myself through school. I have it great. The adjustment thus far hasn't been easy, and who knows what the road ahead holds, but right now, it's all good...it would just be better with a little more sleep. ;)
Friday, September 3, 2010
Finding the Balance
Since there are no specifics for the blog post this week, I thought I would write about what is on the forefront of my mind right now, finding a balance between my work life, academic life, and social life. At the end of the day, work has never been an option for me. If I wanted things, even the basics, I had to work for it. I've been working since I was twelve, though at that time it was just for my grandfather, who did pay me to work on his farm. When I was sixteen I got my first real job so I could pay for my own cell phone and the gas and improvements to my 1986 Nissan p.o.s. I could tell you more about that scenario, but I want to stay on topic. When the Nissan didn't hold out for very long, I had to buy a new vehicle and, at seventeen, signed my first loan agreement.
School was just another thing that wasn't handed to me. If I wanted my education I was going to have to pay for it. I spent my first year of college in New York, loved it, but ultimately decided that after changing my major to something more basic than the Forensics degree I had originally gone there to pursue, I made the transfer to Ball State in hopes of saving money. Even when living in New York, while everyone was going out on Saturday night, I was working, holding down security at the famous Planet Hollywood.
Work has always been the main priority in my life. It has always been the one thing I couldn't opt out of, that couldn't budge. Even when the pressure was mounting on me five years ago when I previously attended Ball State and was dealing with recovery, rehabilitation, and a pending lawsuit against the insurance company that represented the guy that hit me and refused to pay for any of my medical care, it wasn't work that sacrificed, it was school, and it was school that I ultimately had to put on hold.
My life has taken me many places physically, mentally, and emotionally over the years, and now finally I am back here at Ball State trying to finish what I've started, and it feels right. The obstacle I've been facing lately however is this new job I started in May. I work for ACS Inc. in Anderson, an outsource call center for Verizon Wireless. The job is great pay with unrestricted overtime, which, in this economy, who can say they have that? There is such a demand for work at this company, however, that they've instituted a requirement of five hours mandatory overtime per week. I've spent much of my life working as a server and a bartender, only having to work maybe 30-35 hours per week to make my money. Now, with this job, I'm working an average of 50 hours per week, because some how I end up going in on my days off and picking up more work! I've worked as much as 116 hours in one week!
I keep feeling more and more pressure at this job to work more and more hours while also trying to balance school and what little social life I have left. I protest and refuse, but somehow get guilted into working anyway. I mean, it's 3:40 in the morning, and I'm just finishing my homework before going to bed, and then getting up at 7:30. I keep asking myself, when is it enough? How do I find the balance without sacrificing my mental and physical health? I realize this is just the second week of school and I'm sure I'll adjust some more, but at this pace, I wonder if I'm going to be able to keep up.
School was just another thing that wasn't handed to me. If I wanted my education I was going to have to pay for it. I spent my first year of college in New York, loved it, but ultimately decided that after changing my major to something more basic than the Forensics degree I had originally gone there to pursue, I made the transfer to Ball State in hopes of saving money. Even when living in New York, while everyone was going out on Saturday night, I was working, holding down security at the famous Planet Hollywood.
Work has always been the main priority in my life. It has always been the one thing I couldn't opt out of, that couldn't budge. Even when the pressure was mounting on me five years ago when I previously attended Ball State and was dealing with recovery, rehabilitation, and a pending lawsuit against the insurance company that represented the guy that hit me and refused to pay for any of my medical care, it wasn't work that sacrificed, it was school, and it was school that I ultimately had to put on hold.
My life has taken me many places physically, mentally, and emotionally over the years, and now finally I am back here at Ball State trying to finish what I've started, and it feels right. The obstacle I've been facing lately however is this new job I started in May. I work for ACS Inc. in Anderson, an outsource call center for Verizon Wireless. The job is great pay with unrestricted overtime, which, in this economy, who can say they have that? There is such a demand for work at this company, however, that they've instituted a requirement of five hours mandatory overtime per week. I've spent much of my life working as a server and a bartender, only having to work maybe 30-35 hours per week to make my money. Now, with this job, I'm working an average of 50 hours per week, because some how I end up going in on my days off and picking up more work! I've worked as much as 116 hours in one week!
I keep feeling more and more pressure at this job to work more and more hours while also trying to balance school and what little social life I have left. I protest and refuse, but somehow get guilted into working anyway. I mean, it's 3:40 in the morning, and I'm just finishing my homework before going to bed, and then getting up at 7:30. I keep asking myself, when is it enough? How do I find the balance without sacrificing my mental and physical health? I realize this is just the second week of school and I'm sure I'll adjust some more, but at this pace, I wonder if I'm going to be able to keep up.
Like the blog title says: Organized Chaos
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